Sunday, August 23, 2009

I Wanna Hold Your Hand

Across the Universe always puts me in a better mood. I'm doing an assignment for my Apparel Analysis class and instead of just basking in the glory of Prudence singing "I Wanna Hold Your Hand", all I can think about is the rib knit on her sweater that enhances the fit of the garment, and the pleating and godets that are inset in her cheerleader skirt.

I always cry when Prudence sings that song. I'm a sucker. A sucker for this movie. A sucker for love. A sucker for someone beautiful singing so that I can pretend they're singing to me. My heart leaps when everyone in this movie sings.

Well, I've got more homework to do and a boyfriend who's sulking in the opposite side of the apartment. I hate that we have a desk in here now because he's more apt to spend time away from me. How can I be so lonely when he's just in the next room?

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Late Night

I tried to sleep in today. I pretty much rolled around in bed waking Nick up every five minutes. I'm just not good at sleeping in. I thought the late-night food and wine would help, but no. Nada.

I did, however, have this really weird dream about how I was going to be late for work (second one I've had!). Apparently I'd been on vacation and I hadn't told my job (kind of like Cinnamonster) that I had a new job at Clinique. So I was scrambling around for hours trying to find my Cinnamonster uniform and it was impossible. (God, I'm lame.) Then, when I did find it and was lacing my sneakers, a herd of naked men was at my door, digging in my mom's garden. (I mean that literally, not figuratively, of course.) I ran outside but it was too late...

...they'd found her weed. ::insert laughter::

Naked men scrounging around a garden EATING my mother's marijuana plant. So I ripped them from their hands and asked if they'd ever felt real pain! It was medical marijuana, apparently.

Goddamn fried fish before bed. LOL.

But anyway, I'll be up late tonight too. Thank God for being off tomorrow. HOMEWORK IN THE A.M. I work 2:45-3:15 tonight. YUCK! *makes face* I've got a frappuccino (sp?) that I'm going to down before work. Here's to hoping it ACTUALLY helps. Oh, and I've got two hours alone with Kim, who all the other girls think is crazy. At least Alyssa's there 'til 7!!!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Curiouser and Curiouser....

Yesterday was a really odd day at work. I was incessantly complimented by one of my customers. She introduced herself as "Sora" (sp?) after she'd already called me beautiful 19 or 20 times. It unnerved me a little. She touched my skin and my hair and I really wanted to cry out and slap her hand away like your mom did when you were 3 and you were dangerously close to the stove burners.

I got to know Alex better. I think she's great. I like the way she says "Alyson". In fact, all the Spanish-speaking girls at work say my name so nicely.

I had more to write, but my boyfriend's being a dick. He's always like this when he talks to his brother. So fuck it, I'm done.

Sunday, August 16, 2009


I did my first two makeovers today...on 2 ten year old girls. :)

They were adorable. I could tell that the first little girl wasn't as happy with hers, but she was just so tan that all of the colors looked pale on her. The other little girl was as pale as I am with red hair and freckles. I know the first little girl just wasn't satisfied, but I really tried. Clinique just isn't "high impact" makeup, ya know?

At least their mom bought an eyeliner. But I was still about 10 bucks off my sales goal. Ouch. :(

Friday, August 14, 2009

I Hate People

I would have a lovely entry today about how work wasn't so bad, my feet weren't even hurting that bad, etc. etc., but then I stepped in toilet water.

Oh, yes. Toilet water. Because some asshole flooded the womens bathroom and I waded through it unknowingly. I was pissed (no pun intended).

This would have been okay because it happened about 30 minutes before I got off work. Not so bad, right? Wrong. When I got home, there was absolutely no place to park. I shit you not, I drove around for an hour and 45 minutes. I wanted to kill myself.

I'm just way too stressed out lately.

So I bought a dress for my birthday for 12 bucks from work. Chances are I can't find a bra to go with it and I'll look like shit anyway. It's not like I have any friends here. I'm pretty fucking miserable. Oh, and I bought work pants that I don't think I can wear to work. Score. At least they were only 13 bucks.

In other news, Mecca Grill has the best Lebanese food ever.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Polyester Doesn't Breathe--And Neither Can I

Before I start on the intangible mountains of homework that I'm currently plagued with, I'll update everyone. And by everyone, I mean the two people who actually read this.

Work is getting better every day. Monday was the first day that my boss wasn't a complete and total ass to me. In fact, she was nice. I know, it freaked me out too. Maybe it's because I had my lab coat for the first time. Maybe she thought to herself, "So she's a real employee now." Or maybe she just needed to get laid.

The lab coat fits as well as can be expected. The arms are too long and my arms are a little fat, so they don't mesh that well. It doesn't button, so I'll be wearing it fully open 24/7 (although that was the plan anyway). At least it's lined so that I'm not completely suffocated in that stark white polyester cocoon.

I'm getting better at color-matching. The lovely (very lovely) Alyssa removed all of her foundation Monday night so that I could not only practice color-matching, but applying it as well. She's awesome. I don't know how many times I thanked her. I actually retain things when Alyssa teaches them to me.

Sidenote: I matched her shade perfectly for the foundation that she used to use--she's since switched types.

Essentially, my sales are really good. I can expect to reap a lot of commission from this job (thank you, God). So, on to homework and then I'm going to join Nick in some Rock Band time. I just saw the track list for Guitar Hero 5 and I want it. I mean, c'mon--you can play as Shirley Manson. How cool is that?!? Not to mention the fact that if you buy GH5, you get GH Van Halen for free. I need moneyz!

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Size 18, please

My lab coats came in today. They're sickeningly white with big silver buttons and shoulder-pads. I'm wondering if I can cut the pads out....

My boss still likes giving me Hell. She thinks I don't do enough. Then when I put myself out there and go for the proverbial gold, she tells me that I "don't know everything" and basically insinuates that I need to back off. Lady, I made 930 dollars for your counter today. MYSELF. So no matter how much you hate me, I earned an extra $3.72 an hour today for doing my best--even if you feel like my best just ain't enough.

I'm still having trouble color-matching darker skin tones. She's giving me hell for that too. I really wish I had friends here who I could practice on. It's not that I'm uncomfortable doing makeup, it's that I'm uncomfortable being put on the spot. Especially when it's coming from my ice queen of a boss.

On a lighter note, I made $14.72 since an hour today for doing my job AND I ate a feta/tzatziki gyro for lunch. OM NOM NOM. The commission from today almost makes up for the day I missed on Tuesday...well...except not really at all.

All I want is to finish my homework, have Nick come home from the game, and eat some more Greek food. Something tells me I'm not getting any of those things any time soon.

Friday, August 7, 2009

It's All Relative...

I'm wearing my ironic shirt. The one that talks about "Waves for Days"...Nick made fun of me because I've never surfed a day in my life. True, but it came in a lot I bought off of eBay and I wasn't about to chunk a perfectly good t-shirt.

Nick's taking his MPRE this morning and I noticed that he forgot his salad in the fridge, so now I'm in hyper-pseudo-wife mode. I wonder if he ate anything at all. I wonder if he's okay or if by now he's got a headache the size of Kansas. I wonder when he's coming home and if he's going to head straight for the scotch or if I get a kiss "hello". At least the Cubs game is tonight and Zambrano's pitching and he's already broken out his nice camera....

Work is pretty terrible. I can see why they refer to my position as the "revolving door". No one stays. My boss scolds me in front of customers and puts me in such bad shape that by the time I hit my apartment's door I'm ready to bite someone's head off and shit down their neck. I don't know why she hates me. Why her beady blue eyes glare at me from beneath her red bangs that are attached to that red bob (that I'm convinced is a wig) and those jowls aid her pinched lips in her face's permanent glare. I try really hard at work to be everything she wants me to be: pleasing, accommodating, patient, helpful, a whipping boy. Nothing seems to work. Maybe I'll get fired. I've never been fired from a job before. Can you imagine?

Happy Thoughts
  • the possibility that Carlos Zambrano will break a bat over his thigh tonight
  • knowing I got my first paycheck (a small one, but income nevertheless) and I can eat Greek food soon
  • seeing Nick smile at the baseball game
  • getting my lab coat tomorrow
  • Jason texting me about how pretty the moon was last night when it wasn't even dark here yet

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Condescension and Blisters

I worked my ass off today in my opinion, but Nick swears it's still there. My feet are killing me. They're in a world of hurt that I haven't felt in months. I tried my damnedest to do everything right today and I'll be damned if my boss didn't smash my ass to bits constantly.

By the time I got home, I was fuming and Nick kept protesting that I was screaming at him. I hate when he says I'm screaming at him because I'm never screaming at him, just to him. He made blueberry muffins to calm himself, I guess, but hey, I'm benefiting so I don't care.

Customers complimented me all day on my skin and how "beautiful" it is. It made me extremely uncomfortable because in my opinion my skin looks shitty right now. They're like, "You don't know what it's like to have bad skin!" You're right. I don't. But you don't know what it's like to be the only fat girl in Denver. I WIN!!!

Nick is going to be repeating this damned Family Guy sketch all night now. It's the one where Peter thinks Richard Gere is hiding the last Easter egg in his butt. He loves this episode. He's so cute.

So I'm not sure if I want to melt my feet off in the tub or weep that I can't have hummus and meat pies from Zeus. God damn it...when I have a paycheck I can waste, I'm going to eat a massive amount of Greek food. Like, I want hummus underneath my fingernails and the smell of schwarma that won't wash out of my hands. I hate being poor.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Sick Day

What should have been my second "real" day at work was pretty much doomed last night. I've been ridiculously sick (I won't go into detail) and all in all I'm pissed off that I'm missing out on a piece of a paycheck today.

This really blows.

If I get fired over this, I swear to God I'm raising Hell.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

First Day

Friday was my first "official" day working for Clinique. I would not, however, give myself the title of Clinique Consultant yet, because I haven't learned jack yet. Anyway....

I don't have the lab coat yet. I'm also terrified of said lab coat. I asked Alex, my gorgeous coworker from Ecuador, if she bleaches her coat to keep it clean. She insists that no, they say we can't bleach it and she takes a little brush and cleans it (and foundation usually doesn't come out). alhglhalwkdlgkaaljjjkskkkffff...I'm going to be screwed.

I do, however, have a packet of papers to read. I've skimmed the packet at least 5 times, and I've read most of the pages in full at least twice. I still don't feel like I know anything. Makeup is so hands-on, and I have a feeling that I'm going to be afraid to be hands-on with someone stealth-watching me all the time. I can only bloom when no one's watching me like a damned pot waiting to boil!

I learned a little about the products, but more importantly Alex showed me where everything was. Thank God for whoever labeled all the drawers.

I was introduced to many of the girls in cosmetics. I will say that Andrea from Lancome made the biggest effort to get to know me. I'm glad I'll be working close by her.

So no, I didn't put makeup on anyone yet, but I was able to help a few customers by grabbing the items that they needed.

I hope I can live up to their expectations. I'll post more on Tuesday/Wednesday once I've gone back to work.